It’s that moment when you know something is wrong but aren’t sure what.

Your boss has called you into his office and he is wearing a serious look. That part is fine but there is another person also present. You realize something is going to happen for which the boss wants a ‘witness’.

The conversation starts with a few niceties while you wonder what the agenda is and then the bomb drops on you. The company isn’t happy with your performances and instances are cited.

You’re not given a chance to explain and the attack continues on you as if to bait you into an unprofessional outburst.

Don’t worry, you’re not going to be fired on the spot unless you’ve done some dismissible offence. Instead, you’re told something that is bound to rattle you, especially if it is unfair – a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP).

It’s not uncommon for employers to use a PIP as a first step to fire an employee and later in this post I’ll share some red flags with you but for now, know that you do have the power to improve your performance and keep your job.

I remember in my corporate world days we used to have a bell-curve approach to performance reviews. 1 meant you were out, getting a 2 provided the opportunity to improve your performance to a 3 (which meant you were performing as expected for your grade and job role). 4 or even a 5 meant promotion time.

What are Performance Improvement Plans?

A Performance Improvement Plan or PIP is a structured document containing the plan of action designed by the supervisor for an employee whose performance is not up to the mark.

The plan might be created as a result of an unsatisfactory performance review, to eliminate an unwanted behavior that is affecting performance or even as a second chance to an employee who is on the verge of being terminated. That was why getting a 2 on the bell-curve put the employee on a PIP.

Normally your boss and HR will meet with you to discuss the PIP and answer any questions that you have. A good PIP will include giving you support to meet the set goals or Key Performance Indices.

Think of it this way, when you start a new job, you’re put on probation for a specified period of time which could range from 6 weeks to 3 months or even more. If you meet the job requirements and your performance is up to par, you’re confirmed in your job.

This is similar except it’s done while you’re already on confirmed employment. If you’re not able to improve your performance during this period or don’t meet the agreed targets, then yes, you’re employment is terminated.

How to handle a PIP

Don’t take a PIP the wrong way and hand in your resignation because you’re upset.

Instead, discuss the PIP thoroughly with your boss and HR and clarify the goals and how you will be assessed.

Be professional and ask for support. If you’re employer’s intention is to fire you, they wouldn’t put you on a PIP to start with.

I’d suggest setting up a check-in schedule with your boss or a designated colleague so you can course correct as soon as possible and also monitor your progress.

This will demonstrate you’re taking the PIP seriously and also demonstrate your confidence to achieve the required targets.

If you feel you need morale support or more guidance, talk to more successful colleagues about how they do it. Better yet, hire a coach for the period of the PIP who has the experience to guide and support you.

Keep your eyes focused on the goal. When you do achieve it, you’ll have done more than just meet the requirements to keep your job.

You’ll have demonstrated that you are mature enough to acknowledge that there is a deficiency in your performance. That you are also a professional who is willing to overcome shortcomings and emerge successful.

It’s another thing that you might want to quit your job after successfully completing your PIP.

That is your call. Especially if the period of the PIP has led to professional growth and you realize you want to explore new pastures instead of continuing with the employer.

So this is the happy ending but what if your gut feeling is that the PIP is a step to get rid of you?

Signs the PIP is being imposed to fire You

It’s not uncommon for some companies to use the PIP to create a situation where they can fire you at the end of it and avoid any legal hassles.

Some common signs include:

• You’re being targeted by your boss who is making it difficult for you to work by not giving you the required resources or criticizing you
• You are being overworked or given unreasonable tasks
• You’re being baited into a conflict which could take the form of embarrassing you in front of your colleagues or giving credit for your work to someone else
• You are being assigned tasks that don’t fit your competency level. This can one of 2 forms – either the task is below your level or tasks that are too difficult and guarantee your failing.
• Your boss tries to micromanage you and doesn’t give you the space to do your work and indulges in formal channels of communication via email instead of communicating with you directly in person or on the phone
• You’re bypassed for promotions and given lame excuses about where you’re lacking without a chance to defend yourself
• Your boss is giving more credibility to colleagues who engage in dirty office politics without hearing your side of incidents

These are just some examples but you get the general idea.

What’s your plan?

You’ll have the indicators during the PIP planning itself. Especially if you’ve got a history with the boss which isn’t cordial or you’re presently facing workplace harassment. It could be goals being set without the support to achieve them.

In my post on the topic of workplace harassment, I’ve given tips on how you should approach it including checking your company’s policies.

If that is the case, then you need to work out your strategy properly. I would recommend agreeing to the PIP but using that time to update your resume and LinkedIn profile and getting into job search mode.

Once both documents are updated, tap into your network and also apply for jobs that are suited to your qualifications.

Be wary of sneaky colleagues who might try to derail you and play positive politics if you have to play at all.

You might get lucky and have an offer before your PIP is completed and the employer might just give you a good reference because they’re relieved your leaving on your own.

Have you ever been placed on a Performance Improvement Plan or something similar? How did you handle it?

There are good bosses and great bosses. Then there are bosses whom you remember years later for all the wrong reasons.

The deal breaker here is their personality type and how they treat their subordinates and team members.

In the course of your career, you will meet many supervisors and managers. You’ll meet the ones that will lead you and mentor you to reach your highest potential. They’ll endorse you on LinkedIn years after you have left the company where you worked with them.

You can contact when you’ve hit a rough patch requesting them to be a reference and they will gladly do it.

Your relationship with them will transcend the workplace to form a bond for a lifetime.

On the other hand, the Boss could also be one who makes Frankenstein look like a kitten – the Boss from Hell.

I still remember the Service Line Partner in my last corporate job calling an urgent meeting with the Senior Managers to discuss a surge in attrition rates. The firm invested a lot of money in its staff’s development. The partnership was concerned about the loss of its main asset – qualified manpower.

The official reason cited during exit interviews was work life balance and as the next level of management, we were encouraged to assess and change the situation.

At a deeper level, I noticed certain managers whose teams had the highest turnover were the ones who were known to be difficult. As a Technical Resource Manager who worked on assignments with floating resources, it was easier for me to see the problem was connected with personalities and how the professional handled the situation.

There are some great bosses out there, and I speak from experience. My 2 mentors were the best bosses I ever had but for some of us, it takes years to find them.

Until then we believe the Great Boss is either a mythological creature like the Unicorn or a figment of someone’s imagination translated into a management book on utopian management.

Surviving in the corporate jungle with a stress creating boss

In the real world, there are all types of bosses with whom one has to work requiring special survival skills, particularly in a highly political organization.

This week, I’m walking down memory lane looking at 5 difficult boss personality types. Use my off the cuff tips for survival, managing the boss or situation and getting some peace of mind.

Indifferent Boss

This Boss really does not care about anything other than keeping his job and avoids managing conflict. It is possible that this Boss rose through the ranks through natural promotions or because people left, and the slot became empty.

This Boss does not mean any harm but does not mean any good either. The plus point of working for this boss is that if you are driven and like to work independently, you can. You don’t want to work, don’t.

Beware though, when it comes to annual appraisal time, you might find the rug pulled from under your feet.

Survival Tip: Work for the organization, raise your profile and let the Top Brass relocate you to a more challenging area of the organization.

2 useful resources that you can use are:

Karmic Ally Coaching’s Free Executive Presence Checklist Click here or on the image below

Soft Cushion Boss

In contrast to the Indifferent Boss, this Boss would have read up on a lot of management articles and books. He is ready to offer mentor services and free advice at the drop of a hat.

The door is always open for chats. You tend to get so taken in with this boss that you don’t mind when asked to stay late or even work on weekends.

This boss is not very good at conflict management and actually dislikes confrontation. You might find yourself complaining to him and feeling better when showered with praise for your abilities.

But so would the colleague with whom you have a conflict.

At the end of the day, no issue will be resolved. Your work life balance will go for a toss while you sing praises of Boss to anyone who will listen.

Years later, when you have moved on, you will realize that Soft Cushion Boss was responsible for your leaving your job. Even though you might have quoted balance and other issues in your exit interview. You’d be feeling guilty about leaving boss behind.

Survival Tip: Understand that boss is not a replacement for a parent, use the open door policy prudently and work on your own conflict management skills.

Diplomatic Boss

This Boss is cool, suave and has a razor sharp brain. He runs a smooth department, never makes anyone angry and will meet every target.

He sees the Big Picture and knows how he is going to win the race. He will analyze each issue and take required action accordingly.

Like the Soft Cushion Boss, he is a good listener (too good in fact) and knows how to get work out of subordinates.

These bosses often attain powerful positions within the organization and in order to piggy back to success; you will need to align your goals to be the Boss’s goals.

Survival Tip: Review your career aspirations and prepare a logical business case for your own goals. Be circumspect when dealing with this category Boss. Keep your secrets to yourself.

You would also need to polish up your negotiation skills.

Pain in the Neck Boss

This Boss cannot be pleased. A perfectionist to the core, the very act of delegating is traumatic.

You simply cannot do the job well, even if you put in the late hours, work weekends and cancel your leave.

Some clues indicate grumbling co-workers, high attrition rates in your department and being called in just as you are about to go home for a review or task which could either have been scheduled for earlier in the day. Or is not quite that urgent and important other than the fact that boss is making it so.

A good example is the Big Brother Cat style Manager.

Survival Tip: Develop a thick skin, do your job to the best of your abilities and update your resume for use if required.

Mean Boss

This Boss is very mean and does not like anyone to take credit for any good work.

Sometimes hidden under the Soft Cushion Boss or Diplomatic Boss camouflage he will represent to the outside world that he has done the job while you squirm.

If any attributes or credit has to be given, be prepared that it will only happen when things go wrong, and a fall guy is required. Worse yet, admonitions will be copied to a number of people up the seniority chain to discredit the employee.

Survival Tip: You might have visions of playing dirty with this boss but know that meanness can be inborn and this Boss is the master of his game so you might be out of your league.

If you choose to play office politics; proceed with caution, stay a step ahead and find supporters. In fact play positive politics.

Parting Advice for taking back control in the workplace

A lot of the power that the Boss has over you is due to the organizational structure and line reporting.

Just because the boss may make your life difficult at times doesn’t mean quitting and finding a new job. There may be a better fit with another supervisor. Besides, you will run into these types sooner or later.

The better route is to be assertive, know where to draw the line and establish healthy boundaries.

Maintain open dialogue with the boss. Read the HR policy of your organization and consult the Human Resources department before taking any drastic steps.

There may be a way out without having to leave the organization or at least leave knowing that you did your best to survive.

Going forward, when you are the boss, at least you’ll know what you don’t want your reporting colleagues to experience. You’ll have a clearer idea of the leadership style you want to develop.

Are there any difficult boss personality types that I’ve missed out?

Tell us more about them with a tip to manage them in the comments box below.

This post was originally titled Do you know the category of your boss? It has been updated for relevance in 2024.

Written By: Vatsala Shukla

The One On The Highest Chair by Frits Ahlefeldt

Counteroffers are becoming the norm in the corporate world, where you go and tell your boss you are leaving for a better career opportunity and they entice you to stay with a promotion, or match the money or something that makes you forget that you wanted to leave and stay on.

What the employee doesn’t know is that this is a standby solution for the employer which will affect their career further down the line.

My first experience of a counteroffer was sitting on the other side of the table. I know what it’s like from the perspective of a boss who finds himself or herself in a pickle because an employee decides to leave in search of greener greedier pastures.

The scene was my office in Poland in 1995. I had just returned from Paris the previous evening after a grueling weekend at our Regional Headquarters along with the Country Manager and 4 of my Insurance Managers where we had gotten our annual budget approved and opened up doors for career development for our staff.

I was also recovering from septicemia and the trip had been hard on me but the gifts that I was bringing for my Finance Team had been well worth it.

I was a new CFO barely 3 months into a job where part of my mandate had been to lift the spirits of the Finance Department which had been low after the previous CFO had stormed out of the company after a fight with the Country Manager.

The point of no return was confirmed when he had thrown a chair out of the window. We were westernizing things and bringing the team into a new world with the help of the parent company’s Human Resources department.

It was a Monday morning and I had come in early to check my emails before the start of the Monday meeting when a junior team member, who looked after the cash and bank accounting, walked in and wanted to talk.

Let’s call him Jacek. I was happy to see him because the Country Manager and I had plans for him.

Then I had the shock of my life.

This young man had come in to tell me that he was leaving for a better job and better opportunities. I understood that, but what I didn’t understand was his telling me that he could of course stay if I made him a counteroffer.

Had he mistaken my stunned silence as a need to be told what to do next?

I told him to wait till the Country Manager came in so I could talk to him about this employee’s terms and conditions for staying.

The Country Manager was as shocked as me but being a more experienced professional, called Jacek into his office and told him that the Company could not be held hostage with a self-proposed counteroffer.

He was asked to work through his notice period which the chap refused to and pointed out that he had vacation time which he would use against his notice and if anything else was left, then to cut it from his salary.

He was fired on the spot and we found a replacement after a month while a temp helped out.

Of course we could have met his demands and covertly looked for a replacement but the attitude was not correct and a bit of professionalism would have taken him a long way.

To date, I don’t know what became of him and he certainly isn’t on LinkedIn.

For sure you’ll read of all the happy ending stories where the employer and employee lived happily ever after but that involves a lot of diplomacy, tact and approaching the resignation with professionalism that allows both sides to talk about the situation and find a peaceful solution.

It may not be the money; it might be the employee feeling that they are not getting the right exposure or want more challenging work. That’s easy to work with, especially if opportunities are available and I show you how to do it in my book Get Noticed.

Not all stories work out like that but I really don’t think accepting counteroffers are a good idea. Not in the long run at least.

What does a counter offer look like?

In simple English, a counter offer happens when you have accepted another employment offer and your current employer comes back to you with enticements to stay in the current job with new terms and carrots that can be both emotional heart string pullers and financial incentives.

What accepting a counteroffer really does for your career

This isn’t a feel good post and what you are going to read may make you uncomfortable but read on because you need to know what goes on behind the scene of a counter offer and how it can damage your prospects and result in professional Harakiri.

The truth is, there is a cost to company of having you on board which goes far beyond your paycheck and it is easier to retain an employee whom they have invested in with training and other resources than to hire a headhunter to find a replacement.

So there will be surprise when you say you are leaving followed by lots of pull on your loyalty and offers of new designations, promotions, remunerations and coaxing to stay on.

You might have chats with Human Resources and more senior professionals and if you buy into all the flattery that goes with it, then your guilt will be too much to ignore and you might accept the counteroffer.

Things won’t necessarily improve and you run the risk of being labeled as a ‘problem’.

The main reason why you wanted to leave won’t be addressed and you may yet leave although at a later date or get fired a few months later by which time the employer would have found a suitable replacement for you.

Your managers will remember how you were retained and when it comes to promotion time, or increment and bonus time, you might not get what you expected because of an out of turn promotion or money that was budgeted for your carrot having been already spent.

By airing your issues and yet choosing to stay based on a counteroffer, your loyalty and commitment will always be doubted. This could mean that if a layoff is looming in the horizon; you might get the pink slip after all.

Your resignation or the firefighting done to retain you reflects on the boss’s ability to keep his staff and if it means that his own career prospects get affected, he will always eye you with suspicion. You’ll be out of the Inner Circle and considered untrustworthy.

How would it feel if you take the day off for some genuine work and your boss calls to check on your whereabouts?

That’s happened with a former colleague of mine.

I would heartily recommend reading Covey’s book Speed of Trust, whether you are mulling over a counteroffer or want to learn more about credibility building.

If you used the threat of leaving to get a promotion or more money, then know that professionally managed companies won’t play along. You don’t blackmail these companies and think you’ve made it.

That’s what happened with Jacek. He showed his greed and lack of maturity and the Country Manager took a call that we couldn’t have him in the office.

He was not to be trusted. In fact, he was marched out of the office and the guard was told to make sure that he couldn’t access our office again.

Had Jacek approached it differently, he would have found out that we had plans for him and given 3 more months, there was an increment in the offing based on merit and how far I would have mentored him to take on more responsibility.

Had Jacek been more professional, he wouldn’t have burned bridges and the door for him to return to us would have been kept open. Instead he lost our respect.

5 important personal reasons for not accepting a Counteroffer

On the other hand, I can give you tons of reasons for declining  a Counteroffer some of which are already given above but for this post, let’s stick to the 5 personal reasons to keep in mind in no particular order.

In addition to your being labeled, kicked out of the Inner Circle and even being replaced at a later date, ask yourself

1. Why did you have to threaten to resign for you to get that promotion or pay rise. Weren’t you good enough on merit to receive the same?
2. Likewise, what kind of a company is that which has to be threatened before they give you what you are worth? Do you really want to work there?
3. Would you be able to live with yourself knowing that you had been ‘bought’?
4. Accepting a counteroffer will not change the factors that had driven you to find a new job in the first place, so what would change now?
5. Where is the money coming from? Your next pay increase?

In short, once you have made up your mind to leave and have found a new job, the best thing for your future career is to be professional and work out your notice period to the best of your abilities.

Do proper handovers and make the employer feel that your leaving is a loss to the company. Walk out of the door knowing that this company will welcome you back if you ever decide to.

Don’t ruin your image and professional brand by accepting a counteroffer unless it is one where both sides win. If you feel that you need to manage your career better then let us work together and achieve that career progression professionally. 

I’d like to know if you have ever been made a counteroffer by an employer. Did it work out? What one tip would you give to the other readers of this post? Please tell me in the comments box below.

Father kept a poker face and after giving me a patient hearing, suggested I earn the extra income by reading the books in his library, give him viva reviews and get Indonesian Rupiah 100 for each successful book reading.

At 14, that was a super bargain. Music cassettes were costing Indonesian Rupiah 500 at the time and my calculations figured that 5 of the shortest books would get me pretty far. We agreed that I would be paid per book reading completion.

It is another story that I ended up reading Pearl S Buck, Agatha Christie, Jules Verne, Gibran and other great authors and got hooked pretty fast to reading books.

When I read Gone with the Wind, I didn’t bother to ask for money – I just wanted to know whether Scarlett would get Rhett back.

Father was gracious and bought me my first Panasonic cassette player. He said that book was the size of at least 10 books. I had gotten more than I had initially asked for since none of my friends had their own cassette player.

The reason I’m sharing this story is that in later years, I realized that I had actually been subjected to the art of negotiation and in this instance, there had been a Win-Win situation – an introduction to the classics and rewards for me and the delight of my book loving father that he had achieved passing down his passion for reading to his child.

How to prepare before beginning Negotiations

• Research your area for negotiations and don’t start negotiating until you have a good business case or can present your proposal as one of value.

• Get a good understanding of the other party and try to determine what would make them accept your proposal.

• Be prepared to quantify the value and have examples of the benefits to the other party. Have a Plan A and Plan B ready if required.

• Are you dealing with the right person? Does that person have the authority to negotiate and take decisions?

• Make sure you adopt the right attitude, are confident and are ready to work towards a win-win situation.

•  If it is clear that negotiations are not going anywhere, be sensible to withdraw and make a new strategy, unless you have that Plan B ready. 

When You are into the Negotiation Process

In this regard, using open-ended questions to confirm your understanding helps to get more information. If you have prepared well, then you will be in a better position to answer any questions that they have. Engage in attentive and active listening.  Be prepared to pro-actively make changes to your proposal if it will help to complete negotiations and result in a win-win situation.

Be on the lookout for areas where both parties agree and build rapport.

That’s where you emotional intelligence comes into play and I go into the methods of applying this in my post Emotional Intelligence: you need to apply authentic kind of Empathy.

Also make sure that you or your subordinate keep notes of the discussions so that they can be referred back to when submitting a written proposal incorporating all agreed items.

Post Negotiation Wrap Up

If all goes well, negotiations will be concluded successfully. I suggest that a verbal summary be made followed up in writing either the same day or shortly thereafter depending upon the nature of negotiations. Remember to thank the client for their time.  Unfortunately, there will also be times when negotiations will break down or not be concluded to the satisfaction of all parties. 

Even then, it is always advisable to thank the other party and not let your emotions show. You might consider sending a follow up letter or email worded such that the door is left open for future opportunities to work together.

Last but not least, think of what worked and what did not and use the experience as a means of learning to do better next time round.

Your turn, any tips or tricks to help us negotiate a Win-Win outcome?

I’d love to read about it in the comments box below.  Please share this post forward, you never know who needs the information!

PS. I referred to Emotional Intelligence as a skill to enhance your negotiation effort. This resource with supplement tips will help you strengthen your EI by addressing the essential traits you need to demonstrate.

Did you know that I also coach on the area of negotiation> Learn more about negotiating with Karmic Ally Coaching at Career Coaching

Building Bridges by Frits Ahlefeldt

Last night the Northern Grid tripped and entire North India was without electricity for more than 8 hours. No guessing how much shut eye any of us got!

Humid weather with no signs of rain, having the air conditioner on is important unless you are a deep sleeper who will only discover the situation in the morning. If you are a light sleeper, then you would have been up the whole night. Miss Coco my furry pet child is one of them and I know it!

I was up all night trying to get her to sleep knowing full well that she wanted the air conditioner to be put on. I wasn’t able to explain the power outage to her though her message- verbal and non-verbal was getting through to me.

It always does because Miss Coco is an effective communicator.

So how does she do it and what did I learn?

Use KISS (Keep It Simple & Straightforward)

In other words, plan your communication. Know the message you are trying to convey and understand who you are trying to communicate with and how you will do it. Check for effectiveness and rework you strategy.

Coco did it with soft growls and looking at the air conditioner.

Create a Clear Consistent Message

If you don’t know what you want to say, how do you expect the other person to understand?

Think of your choice of words. Pay attention to your non-verbal messages, the words and tone you use. Make sure your words match your body language.

Different Messages Need Different Methods

The choice of communication channel is important.

Depending upon the sensitivity and nature of the communication, sometimes a verbal dialogue is better than sending a letter, email or text message. 

Look at your message from the receiver’s perspective and decide the best route. Dialogue during intimation of redundancy and working out exit strategies are known to make better business sense than pink slips with the pay check.

Check if Your Message Has Gone Through As Intended

This one is important and involves feedback which again can be verbal or non-verbal.

Look out for body language signs. Listen to the other person and consider whether you are both on the same wavelength.

Is the receiver of the communication showing signs of engagement or disinterest and confusion?

Canine Communications

Communicating effectively is a skill and takes time to polish up. With practice comes success.

To see it in practice, watch the Presidential elections or other debates. Note how the words, tone of voice and body language are in sync and sending out a definitive message.

Effective communication is a key skill for good leaders and this little dog is a leader in her own right (says an indulgent pet parent 🙂 ).

Karmic Ally Coaching’s Level Up Your Leadership will show you how to become a better leader to influence, inspire and impact others. 

Update on Miss Coco