Have you ever worked for a boss who is so difficult that it was like a nightmare working with him (or her) and you got to the point where you were worried that you might just lose your job?

Now here’s something.

The odds are that you will always at least have one bad boss in the course of your career. The conditions of the bad boss may vary and that can be a very difficult and challenging to face such a situation.

But there are things you can do to make your life at work more positive. Or to at least try to buy yourself some time until you can find a better job.

Prefer Reading? Here’s the transcript

The first thing that I would always tell you is to keep an open mind and to maintain your composure.

That’s a sign of Emotional Intelligence as well as Executive Presence and you come across with more power even if you’re feeling helpless in a situation. Because staying calm might just be the most important thing that you can do.

If you’ve already got a boss who is a nightmare to work for but is also volatile as well, then please read this blog post for more help. The links will be given and just stay calm.

Most of us have a tendency to try to just avoid the conflict or ignore it but the reason I am saying to keep calm is because somebody has to hold a stable position. Secondly, this beautiful quote from Renee Evensen is very true.

Because ignoring conflict will only aggravate the problem often to the point where even a minor problem becomes unmanageable.

So, when you come from a place of calm and composure, you’re in a better position to be more proactive and to resolve or diffuse the situation.

Keep Your Cool

So, back again, keep your cool. And the reason why I’m saying that again and again is because it’s an excellent opportunity to show others that you’re reasonable and professional.

And maybe your boss’s boss may also be one of those to notice. Because our first instinct is to respond like to like but that is a very big mistake. You want to show yourself in a good light.

As well as the fact that it will also reduce your boss’s tendency to bully you in case the boss is a bully. Because bullies tend to stop if they see their tactics aren’t getting a response.

If you have a toxic boss, then I have other resources that can help you to handle that. But no matter what, keep your cool, do not get aggravated or agitated.

Consider Your Own Contribution

Next, is to also consider your own contribution. You know, it is so easy to blame others for things. But when you look at a situation when the boss may have been nasty, are you sure that you’re not at fault or at least part at fault?

Perhaps it’s just that you do need to make an effort to up your game and not upset the boss so much. After all, bosses are human too.

Get Some Clarity

And then, get some clarity. Find out exactly what your boss wants. In fact, ask the boss and if you can get a list of specific performance measures, preferably in writing, so that you can protect yourself.

That is your annual performance review kdps come into play because those are actually solid markers. If you do hit those performance numbers, it gives your boss less flexibility to make a business case to fire you.

Especially in those organizations where they use bell curves and anybody at a 2 or 1 is out.

2 Things You Need to Do for Your Own Mental Health and Confidence

Now the 2 things you need to do for your own mental health and confidence is keep a sense of humor. Try to laugh about it to yourself. Do not let it upset you too much and also don’t obsess on it much.

Secondly, keep a track of your successes. Now this is something that I keep bringing up in various posts of mine.

And that is always keep your own record of your successes because if you’ve done something which is worthwhile for the company, just write it down.

And keep a record so that if you do lose your job, it’s going to give you a lot of leverage when it comes to negotiating an exit package or a potential settlement.

In other words, keep your own records.

3 Ways to Support Yourself

Now there are 3 ways that you can support yourself in such a situation.

One is to touch base with human resource

Talk to them. Of course, be very aware that sometimes there are political games going on but nevertheless tell human resources what is going on. Put your case in front of them and maybe they can solve things for you. Especially if it’s a big organization where you can be transferred to another department.

Also, consider talking to your boss’s boss

But here be very careful. Do not complain about that boss to your, to his boss but instead, focus on the behavior not the person. Don’t make it personal.

Network both within and outside the company

And thirdly, this is something you should always be doing whether you have a nightmare boss, or you have a wonderful boss and that is to network, both within and outside the company.

It’s very important for you to maintain your network of people because in case you do need to get out of that job, you’ll be sure to find out about any potential job opportunities.

And staying sociable is actually very good for your mental health. It also gives you back some sense of control on your situation if you do have, if you’re finding it difficult to deal with that boss.

Consider Finding Another Job

And then lastly, consider finding another job. Now I’m sure you didn’t expect me to say this to you but sometimes, you know, leaving is the best idea. So, consider your circumstances. Can you do it? Is it possible?

Especially so if your boss is firmly entrenched and if he’s not going anywhere soon, then maybe it’s in your best interest to find an alternate employment. And that is where, you know, networking is going to come into play.

Final Words of Wisdom

So, to sum it all up, final words of wisdom are, dealing with a bad boss is something that we all have to do at some point.

And there is no set formula for getting through the challenge successfully, since circumstances can vary. Which is why some of the tips that I’ve given you are quite broad-based, and you will have to adjust it to your situation.

Also take a careful look at what’s actually going on and decide on a course of action. And hold on tight until you can find another job. Do the best that you can to create an environment that supports the life that you desire.

Because you’re working for yourself and for your family and it’s your well-being and mental and emotional health is most important.

Karmic Ally Coaching’s Emotional Intelligence Checklist

Now I had earlier mentioned to you about keeping calm, composure and how it is a sign of good emotional intelligence as well as executive presence.

And to help you with further develop that I’ve got a free resource which is the 10 Traits (that) Emotionally Intelligent people use for Success.  You can download it for free.

The ebook is accompanied by a series of emails to further help you to further develop your emotional intelligence. This will also help you in dealing with not just a bad boss but with your co-workers and anyone else.

So, and it’s free. Did I mention it’s free? And with that, it’s a wrap. I’m Vatsala Shukla from Karmic Ally Coaching wishing you a very successful career. Bye for now.

Are you experiencing signs that it’s time for a change of job? Or is it a complete career change?

There is a big difference in the circumstances and your next step.

Some time ago, a Career Coaching client of mine tabled an interesting issue for our session agenda.

We’ve had success in raising her executive presence .  This resulted in her not only being given the facilitator role for a major pan-Europe project, but also the company finally sponsored her for an expensive course to improve her skills and credentials.

Things were going great until a particular Monday morning when the department was told of a major reorganization. Naturally the status quo was thrown into disarray. Her superiors were demoted except for her direct reporting line manager.

The true impact on her situation was her being reduced to doing tasks well below her competency level as her superiors were now doing her role. She  stopped looking forward to Monday and boredom.

Her question was, is it time for me to find another job?

The question might appear odd to the reader, but there was a good reason why my client was diffident.

For one thing, she didn’t have the classic situation where most people move onto new jobs giving the diplomatic ‘work life balance’ reason for leaving.

She had a great job; her rapport with her line manager and superiors is awesome and she loves her department.

There have been lots of projects for her which provided job satisfaction until the re-organization happened. But of late, some colleagues had moved on to other jobs.

The issue for her was, what am I doing here right now?

A little probing revealed that her line manager had been raising this subject over the last few months. It was in the context of her career progression which she had been working on based on a completely different set of factors. Never discussing reorganization of her department that could lead to sudden job dissatisfaction.

Fortunately, in this case, the line manager was a quasi-mentor. He helped her explore new options within their department. He suggested a lateral secondment until such time as things settled down again.

The worst-case scenario of leaving the organization didn’t happen.

Not everyone is that lucky.

Sometimes, the signs are very obvious. Yet we ignore them either because it means updating our CVs and doing job rounds or we are so entrenched in the system that we don’t want to get out of our comfort zones and look for something better.

Our boss and colleagues may have bullied us enough to lower our sense of self-worth and we get trapped in a cycle until we break and cannot perform.

Have you also been wondering if it’s time for you to find another job?”

Here are 7 circumstances where I would recommend taking an honest look at your situation and considering whether you should look for new pastures.

1. You don’t feel like going into work on Monday mornings and often call in sick
2. You don’t enjoy the work you are doing – it could be under or over-challenging
3. Your relationship with your boss is far from satisfactory with no open lines for communication
4. You have lost interest in your professional development to get ahead on your career track
5. You are not motivated to perform well in your job and only come in to work because you need to log in your attendance
6. The ambiance in the work place is ‘toxic’ (unhealthy levels of gossip, backbiting, politics and negativity)
7. The stress level in your job is adversely affecting your health and/or personal relationships

If you answered yes to point 7, it might also be pointing towards a potential burn-out.

Some of these circumstances can be worked upon with the help of your human resources department or even you direct reporting boss if he is also your mentor.

In other cases, perhaps it is time to take out that CV, brush it up and start looking elsewhere.

The plus point of such situations is its ability to make us finally confront how we really feel about our job and the work that we do in general.

What we often fail to see is perhaps we ourselves have grown along with our career and perhaps it’s time to try something new.

It’s time to change our career game plan

Barack Obama on Change

That’s what happened with me and I’ve shared my story in my Meet Your Coach Page. In fact, I’ve seen it happen with a lot of high-flying professionals. They wake up one day and realize their job and career track till date no longer makes them tick. They need more.

I’ve also seen professionals take up a completely different path. A dear colleague and friend who established the broadband service subsidiary at one of my global major employers.

He went on to make documentaries until he finally settled into using his lifelong side studies and skills to teach yoga and alternative therapy.

Could that possibly be you?

One clear indicator is you continue to be a top performer but your heart isn’t in it.

You start reading up on areas that interest you but are completely unrelated to your present vocation in life.

Your circle of friends begins to change and you don’t want to talk about work in your leisure time.

You become more open to recruiters who are approaching you with offers in different industries because they believe your skill sets are transferable.

Proactive Action Plan to decide your next career move

Whether it is a job or career change, here is a proactive plan for you to decide your next move.

Think about the 7 circumstances I pointed out above and check if any applies to you.

If you recognized yourself in circumstance 7, take the Burn-out Self-Test to check if you need to course correct your job and life and get instant self-help guidance. It’s an easy assessment based on your reflections of the last 12 months and can provide valuable insights into whether you are heading for burn out or not with suggestions to manage the situation.   Please click here to access the self-test.

Consider whether it’s a career change you want. Download this tip sheet that’s relevant even if you’re under 40 to get some clarity. (click here or on the image below to learn the details).

Update your CV in any case. It is a good habit for enhancing your sense of accomplishment. Who knows, if you get an unexpected call from a headhunter about a dream job, you can act fast. Update your LinkedIn Profile too!

If after your soul-searching and analysis, you feel change is in order, make sure you don’t burn any bridges. Leaving an employer on a good note ensures good recommendations and possibly an offer to return at a later date.

How are you handling the situation where an employment change is inevitable?  Are you job hunting or giving yourself the chance to reinvent yourself?

Been there, done that? Share your experience with me!

Additional Resource for the focused action taker

If you’re an action taker and are ready to step up to the plate to make your next job or career move your best ever, then this mini-course is for you.

The 5 Day Zero in on your Important Career Need Course starts right here and right now.

The intention of this mini-course is to help you get clearer about whether you want a job or career change. And then help you take the next step from a place of clarity.

We use practical and metaphysical techniques to help ascertain your career roadblocks and to move forward in positive motion.

It’s part of the coaching program where my clients discover what they really want. It’s going to show you what you can achieve if you really want to get ahead with your career.

Click on the image below to learn more.

This post was originally published in November 2013 and has been updated for relevance.

Written by: Vatsala Shukla